Daniel Jackson sat up in bed trying to concentrate on the book he was reading and failed miserably. He sighed and put the tome down.
"Jack will you please stop doing that." He turned to Colonel Jack O'Neill who was in the next bed scratching his chest.
"Daniel, its itchin', so I'm scratchin'."
"Colonel, what have I told you about scratching your spots." Doctor Janet Fraiser walked into the infirmary and couldn't resist smiling at two of SG-1's finest confined to bed because of. chicken pox.
"But they're driving me nuts!"
"If I have to I'll tie your hands to the bed."
"Tie me to the bed, eh," Jack grinned, "I never thought you were into that kinda thing Doc, but I'm game if you are." He winked at her, as Daniel blushed and rolled his eyes.
"Don't flatter yourself Colonel," she smiled at him.
"Janet is there any chance of getting a private room?" Daniel asked glancing over to his roommate who had resumed scratching. "He's driving me mad."
"Oh thanks, Danny Boy you're not exactly a barrel of laughs yourself you know." He looked at Janet, "Even when he's ill, he's got his nose stuck in a book."
"Well it's better than whining all the time."
"I'm a Colonel in the United States Air Force, I do not whine." Jack said pouting slightly.
"Hey, time out guys." Janet stood between their two beds and tried to look stern, but she couldn't suppress the smile that spread across her face as she looked at the two men, sitting with their arms folded, pouting like little boys. "Now why don't you boys play nice and if you're good I'll actually let you have visitors this afternoon." She started to walk to the door.
"Hey Doc," Jack called out to her.
"Yes Colonel," she turned to face him, folding her arms across her chest.
"The batteries have died in my Gameboy, can you get me some more, please," he smiled hopefully at her, lifting up the toy.
"Okay, Daniel is there anything you need?"
"No," Daniel groaned and picked his book back up as Jack resumed his scratching.
Major Samantha Carter walked down the corridor carrying several books that Daniel had asked her to pick up for him. She saw Janet walking in the opposite direction smiling to herself.
"Hey Janet, how's it going?
"Don't ask," she shook her head, "I'm on an errand for the Colonel at the moment."
"What's he want?" Sam asked.
"Batteries for his Gameboy." She grinned, "It's like having a ten-year-old in the infirmary."
Sam grinned and continued on her way. As she neared the Infirmary she heard the slightly raised voices of the two men she was going to see.
"Daniel will you put that damn book down for one minute."
"Look Jack I want to read, I do not want to discuss whether Side-show Bob is going to kill Bart Simpson."
"Do you ever watch anything decent on TV or do you just watch your rocks?"
"Yes I do and they're called artefacts."
"Okay what was the last TV show you watched?"
"I watched a documentary on the possible links between the ancient civilisations of South America and Egypt." Daniel paused, "Well actually I taped it and watched it when we got back from our mission to P35."
"You taped it!"
"You tape the hockey games you don't get to see."
"Ah. but hockey is something to be cherished and savoured." Jack said grinning.
"Excuse me." Daniel was getting more exasperated by the second, "What is so important about hitting a little rubber ball round an ice rink."
"It's a puck Danny my boy and let me enlighten you." Jack made himself more comfortable whilst Daniel groaned and covered his face with his book.
Sam decided that now was the time to go to the rescue. So smothering her grin she walked into the room, "Hi guys, how are you feeling?"
"Boy am I glad to see you." Daniel said emphatically noticing that she had brought the books he asked for. She put them by his bed and then handed him a paper bag.
"Thought you might like these too." She said as Daniel opened the bag and grinned.
"Choco-walnut cookies." He grinned at her and took one out of the bag. Sam turned towards her CO.
"Colonel, how are you feeling?"
"Peachy, what do you think." He began to scratch his chest again.
"Jack, what has Doctor Fraiser told you about scratching." Daniel said tiredly.
"Well the Doc's not here is she, so she won't know." He turned his attention to Sam, "So Carter what did you bring your old CO?"
"Sir?" Sam asked, deciding to tease him a little and trying to look confused.
"Well, you've brought cookies and, although he doesn't need them, more books for Danny here, what did you bring for me?"
"Actually, sir. Daniel asked me to bring those books in and the cookies were a spur of the moment thing." She shrugged, "Sorry."
"Oh." He tried not to look too disappointed as Daniel buried his nose in one of the new books he'd been brought. "So nothing at all?"
"Well," Sam decided to put him out of his misery and gave him a bag, which he quickly opened. Inside were a few sports magazines and two new games for his Gameboy.
"Thanks Carter." He grinned at her as he looked at the new games, then remembering the dead batteries looked up at the door of the Infirmary, "Hey Doc, any chance of getting those batteries before I'm discharged from here?"
Janet Fraiser walked into the Infirmary and glared at her patient. "Colonel O'Neill, may I remind you that there are other people here in a far worse condition than you and that my job, first and foremost, is to ensure that the people under my care get the best medical attention." She paused and looked down at him, slightly amused as he tried to back away from her whilst propped up in bed, "I am not here to resuscitate dead Gameboys." She threw a large pack of batteries onto his bed and then turned and with her head held high walked out of the infirmary, leaving a speechless Colonel, Major and Doctor in her wake.
"I wonder who pissed her off." Jack finally said as he started to open the pack oblivious to the disbelieving looks that Daniel and Sam were giving him.
Half an Hour Later
"Well I'd better be going." Sam said, looking at her watch.
"No stay." Daniel pleaded looking over at Jack who had been engrossed in his new games since he'd got the new batteries, "You don't know what it's like being stuck here with." he cautiously looked over at Jack, "him."
"Oh come on Daniel, the Colonel's not that bad." Sam tried not to laugh at the desperate look on Daniel's face.
"Have you ever been stuck in a room with him for 24 hours a day!"
"Well, not exactly a room." Sam remembered the time the two had spent almost freezing to death in Antarctica.
"Sam, all he wants to do is talk, mainly about hockey or play with that damn Gameboy, I swear that I'm going to hear the beeps that things makes in my sleep." Daniel looked over at Jack, who was unconsciously scratching at his chest again, "And he won't stop scratching, he's driving me mad!"
"I heard that." Jack said looking over at the younger man, "You can be rather irritating yourself you know."
"How?" Daniel looked indignant, "All I've done since we've been put in here is try to read my books and make some notes." He lifted up the notepad by his side for emphasis, "How is that irritating?"
"You keep mumbling and arguing with yourself, I keep thinking you're talking to me and so when I ask you what you've said, you just say 'oh nothing'. Do you know how irritating that is?" Jack's was beginning to sound angry.
"No worse than you going on about hockey and how you'd love a nice cold beer." Daniel was furious. "Well Jack, I know I've told you this before but knowing how stupid you are I'll tell you again, I HATE HOCKEY AND I HATE BEER AND I'M REALLY BEGINNING TO HA."
"HEY GUYS!" Sam could see that things were getting out of hand. They both looked at her, and then each other their anger subsiding. Jack picked up his Gameboy and resumed his game the beeps the toy was making the only sound in the room. Daniel picked up his book and buried his nose in it, ignoring both Jack and Sam.
"Okay what's the ruckus?" Janet Fraiser walked into the room and glared at Jack.
"Why do you always look at me?"
"Because Colonel, if there's trouble in my infirmary you're usually the one in the middle of it." She returned his glare and then turned to Daniel, "And as for you, I could hear your yelling halfway down the corridor." She turned to Sam as Daniel looked down sheepishly, "What happened Sam?"
"I said I was leaving." She shrugged and walked towards the door.
"The next time I have to stop an argument between the two of you, I'm going to ask the General to arrange a suitable punishment for you both." Janet looked thoughtful for a minute, "Like cleaning every toilet in the facility."
Jack snorted, "That's not so bad."
"With a toothbrush!" Janet finished and watched in triumph as Jack's smug expression faltered.
"So I want you both to apologise." She waited as they both found something more interesting to look at than each other or Janet. "I'm waiting." She folded her arms as Daniel gave in first.
"Sorry Jack," he mumbled.
"Yeah, me too." Jack shifted uncomfortably on the bed and then started to scratch his chest again.
"See that wasn't so hard was it." Janet looked at them as if they were two naughty boys; she walked over to Jack and slapped his hands. "And stop scratching."
She walked over to Sam and as they walked out of the room heard Jack say, "So Spacemonkey, where was I with the joys and wonders of hockey?" and Daniel's answering groan.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Feedback: Yes if you think it's worth it.
August 20, 2002 Unfortunately MGM own 'em all... I've just borrowed them for awhile and I promise I'll put 'em back though.... although I may keep Jack for a little longer!