The weather was cool, but not so cool that a jacket was required. The sun hung lazily in the sky, tired after a long day of spending it's energy. It dipped low, sipping at the darkening water, recharging before it ventured to the other side of the world to shine it's light once again. The darkness deepened and the air filled with the sharp sounds of frogs conversing and crickets courting in a long session of natural music. The wind shifted and rustled in the trees, tickling the leaves and releasing a sigh as it blew past the two men sitting on a wooden dock. One had laid back against the rough wood, hands laced behind his greying head and fishing rod pinned between bent knees. The other held the rod steady in a sure yet distracted grip. He stared out over the water, inhaling the scent of green and disturbed water, watching the fireflies as they slowly ventured out and experimented in dance. He was a little surprised that they were out this late in the year. He shifted slightly and adjusted his grip on the pole, musing over the fact that, after sitting there all day, neither one had caught a damn thing. Teal'c had once commented that there was no fish in Jack's pond, and said that Jack had responded, "It's not about the fish. It's about fishing." Teal'c had accepted the statement with his usual upturned eyebrow, and later confided to Daniel Jackson that he wasn't certain he totally understood the reference. Daniel had agreed to fish because he needed the companionship, and because he was holding out some hope that there were fish in the pond.
Jack seemed to have dozed off. Daniel glanced at him, then carefully removed the pole from his knees, placing it on the scarred deck. His attention returned to the water. The moon was rising, pooling in a ghostly white, wavering image that mesmerized him. Hypnotized, he watched and his mind spouted out images of it's own accord. White. Clarity. Ascension. His trip to heaven that had turned out to be so much less.
It left plenty of questions in his mind. His faith had been shaken, his faith in humanity, in goodness, in right always prevailing and things coming full circle. He had seen scientific facts torn to shreds before his eyes. He had seen gods rise and fall. Hell, he'd even died. . .several times. Seven years ago he was Daniel Jackson, scholar, husband, happy, firm in his faith. Now. . .now what was he? A bit jaded. Angry. Once again innocent to the mysteries of the world, because he now once again had to question everything. Right when he thought he was finding some answers. Instead of leaping forward, he had fallen about eight million steps back. And he was still on his knees from the impact.
For instance, exactly who was the creator? Who was God? Was there one? Was there internal life, a heaven, or was it all a myth like so many others he had seen? He was beginning to come into line with the Buddhist belief of reincarnation, hell, look at him. He was living proof. As a scientist his religious beliefs differed a bit from the conventional, but he did have his faith. And now. . .now what?
Now what did he have?
A fishing pole.
He had been through so much. Why? Why he, and not someone else? Did he have a different chemical makeup that jinxed him to the world? Was it because he could cope? Learn? Adapt? Insufficient data. Insufficient resources.
Insufficient reasons.
Jack snored lightly. Daniel looked at him, then shook his head and chuckled softly. He remembered something else the Buddhists said. Live for the moment. The moment was what mattered, it was where you were, it was what you had some measure of control over. The past was but a memory, the present stretched forwards in thousands of invisible lines. All you could do was hang on. He smiled.
Hang on and keep fishing.
© July, 2003 The characters mentioned in this story are the property of Showtime and Gekko Film Corp. The Stargate, SG-I, the Goa'uld and all other characters who have appeared in the series STARGATE SG-1 together with the names, titles and backstory are the sole copyright property of MGM-UA Worldwide Television, Gekko Film Corp, Glassner/Wright Double Secret Productions and Stargate SG-I Prod. Ltd. Partnership. This fanfic is not intended as an infringement upon those rights and solely meant for entertainment. All other characters, the story idea and the story itself are the sole property of the author.