*****
"So, everybody okay?" Jack asked his team, minus one Jaffa who was securely bound in the back of the ship, plus one Tokra/like-minded military man, Selmac/Jacob. Jack let out a deep sigh; finally, they were able to catch their breaths now that nine-lives Apophis was down for the count, and they could settle in for the long journey home.
Jack nodded at the mumbled "okays" and "fines" that came in reply. "Excuse me while I go check on our guest," the colonel sighed and reluctantly went to look in on Teal'c.
Daniel raised his head from his clasped fists, opened his eyes and turned to watch Jack leave. Daniel’s expression was pensive, his pallor still betraying his shock at their intense battle with the replicators, with Apophis’ Jaffa, and the realization that their friend, Teal'c, may be forever lost.
Sam watched Daniel watching Jack's retreating back. "Hey, Teal'c is going to be okay," she said softly, laying a hand on his shoulder.
"What? Yeah, he will," Daniel was startled out of his thoughts. He didn't want to articulate what really was going through his head about Teal'c, not just yet, so he chose the safer route. "I was just thinking. . . well, I uh, didn't think I'd ever get a chance to see one of those replicators up close. Thought we'd seen the last of those things."
"Yeah, me too," she agreed. "You know, you did great out there, Daniel," Sam told him. In the heat of the moment, she hadn't really had the time to take full note, but now that they could all breathe again, she realized how much a part of the team Daniel had been; covering them with confidence, firing on the Jaffa and replicators without hesitation.
She smiled wryly to herself. Looks like the military is finally rubbing off on our archaeologist/linguist.
*****
Later, the Carters were standing at the ship's control panel animatedly discussing hyperdrives and crystals. Jack was sitting with his back against the wall doing his best to ignore them. It was almost as bad as when Carter and Daniel got going on some new discovery -- talking one hundred miles a minute, hands waving all over the place. He either had to yell at Jake and Carter to give it a rest, or ignore them. Being too tired to yell, he was choosing to ignore.
So was Daniel, apparently. Well, he didn't look like he was having too much trouble ignoring them, Jack noted. Daniel was sitting right beside him, but looked a million miles away. Jack could practically see the wheels spinning in Danny's constantly startling, overactive mind. The kid thinks way too much. That was half his problem in life.
"You know, when we get home, and Teal'c gets back to himself, I'm taking us all fishing for a week. Even Jake. Even if I have to drag all of you there," Jack said, looking at his friend's profile, hoping to distract him from most likely troubled thoughts.
"Hmm, sure, Jack," Daniel murmured.
"Sure? Not even a word of protest about all the translations or whatever you're going to have catch up on?"
"Okay," Daniel answered, not looking at the colonel, but off in the distance.
"And, after the fishing, I'll take you out to the strip clubs, get you drunk, get your ear pierced, and have 'Ra is dead' tattooed on your butt."
"Sure."
"Daniel!"
He jumped and looked at Jack. "What?" his voice holding a tinge of irritation.
"You sure you're okay? One of those bugs didn't crack you on the head or something?"
Daniel smiled slightly. "I'm fine, Jack." He then stood. "I'm going to go look in on Teal'c."
"I'll come with you," Jack moved to get to his feet, too.
"No, it's okay," Daniel waved Jack off. "I'll be fine. . . just want to see. . . you know, let him know he's not alone."
"Just be careful, and don't get too close to him, all right?" Jack said firmly.
"I'll be careful."
*****
Teal'c sat propped against the far wall, his legs stretched out in front of him, hands securely bound. He stared at Daniel impassively, coldly, as he stepped inside the bay door.
"DanielJackson." The name came out as a disdainful statement, rather than Teal'c's ordinarily kind, questioning voice.
"Yes," Daniel said, stepping further in. "Do you need anything? Water?"
"I need nothing from the Tau'ri. A race of slaves," Teal’c sneered. "I would die before I took anything from you ever again."
"You once were a part of us. You once tried very hard to fit in with us, understand us even."
"That was a lie, it was all I could do not to let you meet your deaths on many occasions."
"Yes, I believe you told us all that, before. If you've been lying for four years straight, Teal'c, I'd say you're a damned good liar."
"And do you not lie as well?" Teal'c snarled, never moving his narrowed eyes from Daniel's face.
"Uh. . .e-excuse me? What do you mean?"
"How is it that you can call a man who turned your own wife over to Apophis, your friend? The man who chose her for the queen of Apophis. Watched her struggles as the queen Amonet entered her screaming, resisting body."
Daniel clenched his jaw, but remained silent.
"Unless you are simply weak. Only a man who is a coward, who is weak, would not have killed the person responsible for those actions. And even when it was I who delivered the staff blast that terminated the life of Sha're," Teal'c paused, pleased to see the younger man flinch at the mention of his wife's name, "when I terminated the life of Sha're, you still did nothing."
Daniel crossed his arms tightly across his chest and struggled to control his rising temper. This isn't Teal'c speaking, he reminded himself. Not the Teal'c we know. Teal’c wouldn't have turned again, not willingly. He really hoped, prayed he was right, because if he wasn’t. . ..
"You should thank me," Teal’c continued with relish, interrupting Daniel’s racing thoughts. "I saved Sha’re from a life of misery and poverty and made her a queen -- something you never could have done."
Daniel quickly moved closer to the Jaffa, staring down at him, his blue eyes flashing with anger, hands clenched into fists. "You know, Teal'c, someday, soon, I hope, you'll wish you had never said that," he said, his voice tight. "And, while we're talking about honesty, I'll tell you something I'll probably wish I'd never said, either."
"When you first came back to base with us from Chulak, yes, I was grateful to you for saving our lives. Yes, I was glad that you chose to go against your 'god' and join us. But you know what? Honestly? For the first few months, I had a hard time even looking at you without feeling sick to my stomach. I felt guilty for having moments where I wanted to put a gun to your head and blow it off for what you did to Sha're, to Skaara and God knows how many others. I didn't want to trust you. Like they say, 'once a traitor, always a traitor.'"
Teal'c turned his head slightly, watching Daniel with interest now. The younger man was breathing hard, speaking in a low voice, meant only for Teal'c's ears.
"Maybe I did lie, in the beginning, when I said that I forgave you. I thought that I had made a choice: I could either let the anger, the rage at you and Apophis consume me, or I could choose to forgive you. I chose forgiveness because I thought it was the right thing to do. Then, when you killed Sha're to save my life, I told you that you did the right thing. But, in reality, it took me a long time to forgive you, Teal'c. It wasn't until Shifu gave me that dream, that I realized, deep down, I still hadn't truly forgiven you. That some part of me still wanted you to pay for what you did."
"It appears that you now have your chance for revenge. Do you wish to put a gun to my head?"
Daniel looked at Teal'c for a long moment. "No - no I don't, because I have finally forgiven you. And through the past few years, even though I hadn't yet forgiven you, I still called you my friend, because I knew that you were a good man. Knew that you made a choice you didn't have to make. You chose to join us at the risk of your own life, leaving your family, everything you cared about behind, to fight for what you believed in. For that, I could put my feelings aside."
"It is a long way back to your homeworld," Teal'c said quietly. "If I were to free myself from these bonds, I would do my best to kill all of you and return to my god. If I were to kill O'Neill, or the woman, Major Carter, or take her back with me for a host, what would you do then? Would you still forgive me? Say that I was not myself? That my actions were not my own?"
"No. If you did anything to Jack or Sam, I would put that gun to your head and put you out of your misery. Just like you did with Sha're. If you were even capable of killing Jack or Sam, then I'd know we'd lost you forever. I'd be doing you a favor."
Teal'c bowed his head slightly, as if in as if in agreement. At least Daniel thought it was in agreement. He wasn't quite sure.
Daniel turned and moved to leave -- he had to get out of there before he said something even worse. He realized that he was trembling from head to foot, and not just from anger either. He'd shocked himself by that outburst, that truth finally spoken. Maybe it needed to be said, maybe Teal'c wouldn't remember it later, when they got him back.
When they got him back.
There was still hope for Teal'c, Daniel firmly believed that.
He took a deep, shaky breath, then stopped and looked over his shoulder to regard Teal'c once more. "I don't really believe that you would do that, Teal'c. Harm one of us. I believe that you're still that good, strong man in there. We'll get you back."
Daniel stepped out of the room and closed the door only to nearly bump into Jack.
"Everything okay?" Jack looked at Daniel, frowning in concern. Daniel's face was ashen, his eyes hard.
"Everything's fine Jack. We'll get him back. We will."
*****
This is my first missing scene effort, in response to a list challenge to come up with some scenes that may have happened in the long ride home back to Earth. This is also something I've wanted to tackle for a while - Daniel deep down, must have had a hard time forgiving Teal'c for what happened to Sha're. He can't be that nice all the time! ( :^) ) This touches on it a bit.
© July 11, 2001 The characters mentioned in this story are the property of Showtime and Gekko Film Corp. The Stargate, SG-I, the Goa'uld and all other characters who have appeared in the series STARGATE SG-1 together with the names, titles and backstory are the sole copyright property of MGM-UA Worldwide Television, Gekko Film Corp, Glassner/Wright Double Secret Productions and Stargate SG-I Prod. Ltd. Partnership. This fanfic is not intended as an infringement upon those rights and solely meant for entertainment. All other characters, the story idea and the story itself are the sole property of the author.