Crappie

Written by PHO
Comments? Write to me at phowmo@mindspring.com

MISSING SCENE for The Curse

"O'Neill?"

"Yeah, Teal'c?" He's standing beside me on the dock. Stiff as a board, not a relaxed muscle in sight. Please, please don't let him ask.

"Are we having... fun yet?"

Crap. He asked. "Yes. Yes, we are." There goes that damn eyebrow again. "Trust me, Teal'c. We're having a wonder -- What the hell?" Oh, no. No. What part of NO do those people not understand? This is my vacation, dammit. Mine and Teal'c's. Fishing for crappie. Davis, this better be good.

"Colonel O'Neill, Teal'c."

Not good, the driver's turning the car around. Keeping the motor running means a short visit. Not gonna give an inch on this one. "Major."

"Major Davis. Do you wish us to return to the SGC?"

Try not to sound so excited, Teal'c. Shit, the major's trying to hide a grin.

"Not exactly, Teal'c. Colonel, the general regrets that you --"

"-- have to give up my vacation, but the world needs to be saved... again. What is it this time? The Tollans catch a thief? The Tok'ra get their panties in a wad? Oh, wait. The Asgard want me to christen a ship."

"Uh, actually, sir. None of the above. You're needed in Egypt."

"Egypt. As in Land of the Pharaohs, pyramids, rocks?"

"Yes, sir."

"Send Daniel. He likes that stuff." Even as I say it, warning bells are clanging inside my head.

"He's already there. As are Major Carter and Dr. Fraiser."

"Why are they in Egypt, Major Davis?"

Good one, Teal'c. I'd like to know that too. What's this? Davis looks... concerned. The bells have become sirens. Loud sirens. "Spit it out, Major."

"They tried to stop a... unique threat, sir."

My heart's in my throat. They better be okay. Davis dies here and now if they're not okay and he's taken this long getting to the point. Oops, he just went a little pale. Better practice the poker face more often, O'Neill.

"They're fine, sir. The only casualty is Dr. Steven Rayner. He's in critical condition, but expected to make a full recovery."

"Recovery from what?" Are those my teeth grinding? God-awful noise.

"A Goa'uld assault, sir."

"WHAT!"

Odd, I've never heard Teal'c shout. Davis is downright ashen now. Surprisingly, I'm calm. Very calm. It's all very simple. Daniel will never, ever be allowed out of my sight again. Like I said... simple. "Wh..." Oh, that sounded bad, almost a croak. Let's try it again. "What Goa'uld, Major?"

"Osiris, sir."

"Osiris has been missing for thousands of years. As has his mate, Isis." Teal'c has regained his composure. Damn, he looks stupid in that hat. "Legend has it that they were banished by his brother Setesh."

"Actually, according to Dr. Jackson's notes, that's correct." Davis looks slightly embarrassed, then continues quickly before I can interrupt. "The Dr. Jordan who died in the lab explosion in Chicago was in charge of some recently re-discovered artifacts from a dig in the 1930's. Among the artifacts was a 10,000 year old amulet --"

"10,000 years? Isn't that a little old?" See, Daniel, I do listen... sometimes.

Davis nods. "Yes, sir. The amulet went missing, and Dr. Jackson was helping Dr. Sara..."

A woman? Crap. I might have known there'd be a woman... When did we get in the car?... Oops, Davis is still talking.

"--ants. There were also two funerary jars, the Osiris jar that was supposedly destroyed in the explosion that killed Dr. Jordan. The other jar, the Isis jar, was returned to the SGC. Examination revealed that it contained a dead Goa'uld symbiont."

"Isis?" Damn, you're good, O'Neill.

"Yes, sir."

"Then Osiris will be very angry. Legend has it that he and Isis were unusually devoted to each other."

Warning sirens are now claxons. Funerary jars. Shit. Not big enough for... "Who'd the symbiont in the Osiris jar take over?"

"At first, Dr. Jackson believed it was Dr. Rayner, but it was actually --"

"The woman...."

"Yes, sir. Apparently she and Dr. Jackson had a, uh, history."

"Damn!" Jesus, Daniel!

"Dr. Jackson, Major Carter and Dr. Fraiser were sent to Egypt following Dr. Rayner, who by now was a suspect in three murders."

Oh, this is getting better and better. "Mind if I ask, whose?"

Davis checks his notes. "The original murder of Dr. Jordan, then the curator of the museum in Chicago followed by the lab technician who performed carbon-dating on the amulet."

"The murderer was not this Dr. Rayner. It was Osiris covering his tracks."

How does Teal'c do that smug look anyway?

Davis smiles slightly and grabs for the armrest as the car takes a curve way too fast. "Yes. But we didn't know that when Dr. Jackson left for Egypt."

"I understand. Please... continue."

Hey, wait just a minute. I'm the colonel.

"Yes, sir. They followed Dr. Rayner's trail to a tomb in Egypt and found him badly injured within the tomb. A few moments later, Osiris/Sara appeared. Dr. Jackson shot her --"

"What!" Now I'm shouting.

"-- with a tranquilizer dart prepared by Dr. Fraiser, but missed because..."

Now that's the Daniel I know.

"... Major Carter and Dr. Fraiser attempted to fire on her with their weapons, but Osiris used a ribbon device to knock them into a wall."

Now see, I know my eyebrows raised on that one.

"But... they escaped serious injury, sir. However they were knocked unconscious for a brief period of time."

"And Daniel?" The claxons have upgraded to drums, using my skull for a drumhead.

"Osiris attempted to gain information from Dr. Jackson by using the ribbon device..."

Davis, you are oh-so-dead.

"... but he was able to stab her with a tranquilizer dart before she could inflict permanent injury."

Okay, you get to live. "Then what?"

Davis sighs heavily. "It's not good. Seems that his pyramid ship had been hidden for millennia under the sand. He activated it and then used the transport rings to make his escape."

"Sweet." Of all the stupid times to go fishing. What was Hammond thinking, letting Daniel and Carter handle this on their own? Without their CO and dragging Fraiser along for crying out loud. What was she supposed to do? Take the Goa'uld's temperature? Shit. He and I will have a talk. "So, I'm needed in Egypt. What for?"

"Cover story, sir. You've been presented to the Egyptian government as the foremost military authority on the terrorist group that kidnapped and assaulted Dr. Rayner and then assaulted Dr. Jackson and company while they were on vacation in Egypt. I'm afraid their intelligence agency wishes to discuss the terrorists, in some detail."

"Ya think? Just what am I supposed to tell them?"

"Oh, we've prepared quite an impressive dossier on this 'group', sir. You'll need to study it closely en route to Cairo."

He hands me a portfolio that's at least an inch thick. Special. Davis hides a smile so I guess my sigh was audible. Gotta watch that, O'Neill. Sarah's picture's the first one in the folder. Pretty woman. Daniel has always had good taste. Too bad about the Goa'uld. Like I said before, Daniel will never, ever go anywhere alone again. Who else could go to a funeral and find a Goa'uld? A new Goa'uld to boot. And because of my archaeologist's little talent, I've now gone from fishing for crappie in Minnesota to delivering crap in Cairo. Looks like a crappy day. A very crappy day, indeed.

~ The End ~


© September 23, 2000 The characters mentioned in this story are the property of Showtime and Gekko Film Corp. The Stargate, SG-I, the Goa'uld and all other characters who have appeared in the series STARGATE SG-1 together with the names, titles and backstory are the sole copyright property of MGM-UA Worldwide Television, Gekko Film Corp, Glassner/Wright Double Secret Productions and Stargate SG-I Prod. Ltd. Partnership. This fanfic is not intended as an infringement upon those rights and solely meant for entertainment. All other characters, the story idea and the story itself are the sole property of the author.

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