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A wise man once noted that there are two kinds of people in the world. One looks at a glass of water and sees it as half empty. Another looks at the same glass and sees it as half full. So to accommodate both views, I have split the following list into two perspectives. One for the Type A Half Empty kind of person and one for the Type B Half Full kind of person. You can decide which is the most appropriate one for you.
The Twelve Step Plan For Stargate Addicts
1. A. I admit that I am powerless over my addiction to Stargate SG-1, that my life has become unmanageable due to my addiction.
B. I admit that I am powerless over my real life, and that it is interfering with my enjoyment of Stargate SG-1.
2. A. I believe that a greater power than myself can restore me to sanity.
B. I believe that quitting my job would restore my free time to watch my Stargate SG-1 tapes over and over and over again.
3. A. I have made a decision to turn my life around and defeat my addiction.
B. I have made a decision to turn my addiction around to defeat my real life.
4 A. I have made a searching inventory of my life.
B. I have made a searching inventory of the web for more Stargate fanfic.
5. A. I admit to myself and another human being the exact nature of my problem with my addiction to all things Stargate related.
B. I admit to myself and another human being the exact nature of my problem with my real life is that there isn't enough Stargate in it.
6. A. I am ready to remove this defect from my character in order to improve the quality of my life.
B. I am ready to ignore real life until such time as I am evicted, jailed, or hospitalized.
7. A. I seek to overcome my shortcomings.
B. I seek to overcome season 4's shortcomings.
8. A. I have made a list of all the people I have harmed by my addiction and am willing to make amends to them all.
B. I have made a list of all the people I have ignored because of my addiction and will continue to ignore them as long as I have access to cable TV, a VCR, and the Internet.
9. A. I vow to make direct amends to such people whenever possible, except when to do so will injure them.
B. I vow to read all fanfic posted to my lists every day, answer at least one thread per list, and work on a missing scene for each of my favorite episodes.
10. A. I will promptly admit when I am wrong.
B. I will promptly throw a fit when the syndicated season is preempted by sports.
11. A. I will pray for the knowledge of how to better live my life.
B. I will seek out a region free DVD player and all the Stargate episodes available on DVDs to further indulging my addiction.
12. A. Having experienced a spiritual awakening as a result of these steps, I will try to carry this message to other addicts and practice these principles in all of my affairs.
B. Having experienced a spiritual awakening as a result of Stargate SG-1, I will join a dozen lists, read every story archived at Heliopolis and Stargatefan, and carry this message to other addicts in all the Yahoo Chat Rooms.
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Hi, my name is Lin and I'm a Stargate addict . . .
© March 25, 2001 The characters mentioned in this story are the property of Showtime and Gekko Film Corp. The Stargate, SG-I, the Goa'uld and all other characters who have appeared in the series STARGATE SG-1 together with the names, titles and backstory are the sole copyright property of MGM-UA Worldwide Television, Gekko Film Corp, Glassner/Wright Double Secret Productions and Stargate SG-I Prod. Ltd. Partnership. This fanfic is not intended as an infringement upon those rights and solely meant for entertainment. All other characters, the story idea and the story itself are the sole property of the author.