• SPOILERS: "Meridian", "Revelation", "Maternal Instinct", "Reese", "Abyss"
• SEASON: 6/7th Season (after Daniels ascension but before his descending, not including his appearance in Abydos when he faced Anubis)
• SUMMARY: Summery: Jack is still suffering from losing Daniel and the situation gets out of line when SG-1, together with the Tok`Ra, has to start a search for one of their worst enemies…with some surprising consequences…
• PG [A] [AU] [Hc] [CD]

It was a very careful knock on his door that got O’Neill’s attention this evening.

After returning from a four hour horror trip including a fight against hundreds of snakeheads he wasn’t really keen on having any visitors at all.

He just wanted to be left alone.

"Yeah?"

Slowly the nervous shape of Jonas Quinn pushed itself through the small opening of the door, away from the bright corridors of the SGC. Realizing who it was, Jack sighed.

"Colonel O’Neill?"

"Jonas? Whatcha doing here?"

The young man approached Jack’s desk, crossing his arms in front of his chest.

"I just wanted to apologize for endangering our life on P7R 330- I should’ve thought twice before communicating with the natives on this planet. I am very sorry."

"Yeah, that’s alright."

Jack even managed a short smile.

"You haven’t been on bord for so long, you couldn’t know. As long as you don’t do it again, otherwise I’ll kick your…"

"No…I promise."

Jonas attention drifted away to the object, O’Neill held in his hands.

"What’s that?"

Jack started to get annoyed from this kids curiosity. It was just too much for him, after all he’d been through the last few month with Dan…he didn’t want to think about it again. At first he wanted to hide it, but realizing that Jonas then would become even more curios, he gave in.

"Well, that belonged to Daniel, it’s his…diary. That’s where he wrote down all his tricks to really piss me off: contacting foreign species without asking, touching dangerous things without asking, getting in trouble without asking…dying without asking…"

Full of interest, Jonas sat down. Jack didn’t like the idea of him doing that. This was gonna get very private if he wasn’t careful.

"You must miss him terribly. I’ve experienced the same situations with Major Carter and Teal`c. Doctor Jackson must’ve meant a lot to you."

"Well…kinda. I’d love to know where he’s hanging around right now…literally."

Jack wished he could just throw that guy out the door but on the other side he felt that it was about time to talk. Nevertheless it’s been four long month since Daniel…disappeared. His apartment had been closed down, his personal stuff stored in Jacks basement, his car parked at the SGC, his friends informed about him being missed in action.

"Well…at least he’s happy. Has always been keen on that path- thing, lighting candles, flying around, let things disappear."

Jonas was confused.

"You talk like you don’t really care where he is right now…I’ve heard Major Carter asking for a memorial service but you declined."

"And?"

"Colonel, I’ve seen you doing guard duty on Daniels death bed- why do you hide your personal feelings from Major Carter and the others. You think they’d laugh at you?"

Jack’s level of awareness rose when this conversation was going into a direction he really didn’t like.

"Daniel’s not dead. He’s just…ascended…rising up into a higher level of consciousness or existence, whatever, I don’t know about that stuff anyway. He’s having fun, he can save the world- he’s got what he always wanted to have. Where’s the problem?"

"Major Carter told me you’ve been very close. I just don’t understand how you can act as if nothing ever happened?"

O’Neill took a deep breath, thinking twice before he answered.

"Maybe…because I wish I’d be like that."

***

The alert turned on and Jack jumped up from his chair, as well as Jonas who went out of the door right away, running to the debriefing room.

O’Neill stayed in his office for a few more minutes, relaxing before the stress would get the power over his body again.

He hid the diary in one of his shelves, put some files down to the ground and turned off his desk light when he suddenly saw that picture again, taken from the stuff in Daniels apartment.

They took it on a B-B-Q evening and it showed Daniel grinning- obviously drunk- together with his team mates, having a blast in eating a huge tuna sandwich.

For several seconds the overwhelming feeling of missing him flooded through his mind, a part of his heart and soul, that never wanted to let him go that day when Daniel asked him to.

But soon- too soon- the logical part of his brain got active, telling him, that Daniel was gonna be alright.

"That’s ridiculous.", he muttered under his breath.

Daniel wasn’t dead, he just…ascended.

***

What did Cassie say about her new pet?", Sam asked smiling, while she sat down on one of the beds in the infirmary.

"She was thrilled. You should’ve seen her face when that little rabbit jumped out of the box into her lap."

Both women smiled while Fraiser took some blood samples.

"You were lucky that you didn’t get killed on that mission, Sam."

The doctor seemed to be very concerned and put the samples on one of her rolling tables.

"Yeah, this time it was pretty close…if Jonas wouldn’t have talked to those aliens we never would’ve been in trouble!"

Suddenly her voice sounded angry and Fraiser concluded that she didn’t really like the man from Kelowna.

"And then he kept running around in the middle of a second world war scenario while Colonel O’Neill and me were trying to get him outta there and get back to the Stargate."

Janet finished taking her pulse and blood pressure and smiled.

"I know somebody you complained about as much as about Jonas, if not worse…"

Within seconds the expression on the majors face changed. Her eyes got wet, her lips thin.

"That…was something completely different.", she explained while one tear was running down her face.

"Jonas has been on mission with you guys only a few times before. Don’t be too hard on him or you’ll loose him."

Carter gazed to the other wall in the room, trying to hide her tears.

"I just want Daniel back."

Janet took her hand and hugged her for a second, apologizing for not thinking when she started with that topic.

"Sam, he did the right thing. Even if Jacob could’ve helped him, he would’ve never been the same person again. He’d probably have to live with thick bandages around his body for the rest of his life…and that’s not a life. He deserves better than that."

Even Janet couldn’t resist on shedding a tear when the memories came back.

"It was probably the best he could’ve done."

Sighing Sam wiped away the tears from her face.

"I don’t have much more energy left to cry. Every time I try to get over it I just want to go into his office and be with him, watch while he’s working, drink coffee with him…but then I remember and I just want to cry again. Why him?…Why didn’t they wait with their tests until we came back? I could’ve figured out something. I could’ve prevent THAT from happening…but instead, we were on our meet & greet tour through the complex while Daniel gave his life to save the entire planet…I just miss him so much that it hurts everyday over and over again to see Jonas taking his place. He doesn’t belong to us- Daniel does."

Janet patted her shoulder, trying to keep her feelings back. Sam knew that Daniel and her had been very…very close, yet she still tried to be in control and hold back her tears.

"How long has it been?", Carter continued, "Four month? Four month and I am still talking as if he’d just left."

"But he is not dead, Sam."

"But what is he then? An ascended being? An enlightened space travelling entity? What’s that crap about a higher level of existence? If he really became something like an angel, then why doesn’t he just come back to us…?"

***

"Sit down, Colonel."

Going by Hammonds tone of voice it should’ve rather sounded like "Finally here, Colonel?" Jack took a look around. Sam and Teal`c sat on the other side of the table, Jonas next to them.

There was a new Tok`Ra sitting next to O’Neill on…Daniel place.

Everything looked like normal. When the Tok`Ra couldn’t figure out something themselves they found a way to let SG-1- as far as you could still call it like that- do the difficult job of seeking for the problems solution.

A good thing earth still existed and hadn’t been destroyed by the Goa`uld yet. Who else would allow such a tremendous, impudent, arrogant abuse of friendliness than the people on earth?

"Colonel, this is Jabar, an important member of the Tok`Ra, adviser of security matters."

O’Neill nodded.

"Adviser of security matters…guess we’re kinda walking the same path, aren’t we?…Metaphorically I mean."

Hammond sighed.

"Jabar is aware of your rank and position in SG-1, Colonel.", he clarified.

"Well, then let’s roll.", O’Neill suggested and the Tok`Ra started to talk.

"As you know by now, Anubis appearance in the league of the system lords has caused some dramatic changes. Many of them are afraid of his power and prefer alliances instead of wars."

"Couldn’t get any better, could it?", Jack spoke, observing Hammonds gaze, but there was no reaction to his comment.

"At the present time a union of Goa`uld has been located. Together with Ni’irty they are travelling through the galaxy, attacking everything that belongs to Anubis. We don’t know of all the system lords that are part of that union but we know for sure that also Yu participated."

"I thought they hate Ni’irty?", Sam asked and raised her eyebrows.

"The enemy of my enemy is my friend, as you might call it. Anyway, this group now found a location where they can train their Jaffa groups and from which they can start attacks without being found by other Goa`uld system lords."

"Where?", this time it was Jack who asked that question.

"On Kheb."

"Kheb. That’s Oma Desalas planet, isn’t it?", Hammond asked curiously.

"Isn’t that Daniels playground?", O’Neill added and looked at the Tok`Ra.

"We don’t know for sure whether Oma Desala or Daniel Jackson are on that planet, as well as we don’t have more detailed information about the location of their camp but we do believe that it is close to the Stargate. We tried to send two Tok`Ra spies through but they’ve been killed. What we do know for sure is that they’ve discovered the mysteries of Kheb and that they are planning on making it into a huge Goa`uld base camp. We have to prevent that from happening."

"WAIT…wait a moment, ", O’Neill stopped him, "Did I just hear WE?"

Jabars eyes widened and he looked to the general.

"We have to stop them from attacking Anubis, General."

"Why? And why should we be doing that?"

Even Hammond got suspicious.

"You cannot compare Anubis to the other system lords. He acts strategically, not destructive. In case this group starts an attack on one of his ships, he will let his Jaffas execute the leaders of the organisation. But only them. He’ll then take over the whole army of Jaffas and his power will grow and extend. We have to stop Ni’irty."

"Did I just hear WE again?", O’Neill was pissed. He should’ve seen it coming…

"So he’s practically like a virus…", Sam looked at the general, her voice full of concern.

"Sir, he’s got a point there. We should try to prevent an expansion of this group on Kheb. If they build up a huge battalion of Jaffas and lose the fight against Anubis he’ll be almost twice as powerful as he is now…and maybe we’ll also see Omah and Daniel again. They might be able to help us."

Hammond looked at her sceptically.

"Isn’t there a law that prevents higher…beings from helping other cultures?"

Sam nodded carefully.

"Yeah, but when Ni’irty really tries to attack the temple on Kheb, Omah won’t just sit there and watch. She’ll defend it as she did before- which could then…be a strategic advantage for us."

"What do you think, Teal`c?", Hammond asked when the Jaffa raised his head.

"I do believe that it is necessary to destroy Ni’irties plans about Anubis, General Hammond. We cannot allow him to become more powerful as he is now."

"Now, what happens in case we prevent all Goa`uld System lords from attacking Anubis? Aren’t we giving him a free ride to conquer this whole galaxy?", the general asked again.

"Well, we don’t know how to stop Anubis yet. The Tok`Ra are still working on the virus we once wanted to use in that Goa`uld conference. Then it should be easy to kill him and re-establish the natural balance between the other Goa`uld system lords."

"You think it’ll be easy to kill Anubis?", Teal`c asked. In his tone of voice O’Neill understood how furios the Jaffa had become.

"A lot easier as long as he is still building up his army. Once he is finished he won’t quit until every Goa`uld that doesn’t support him is dead. By that time he’ll have enough power to pass over the contract made with the Asgard to protect planets. He’ll destroy everything that has been in his way before, to reach the absolute power in this whole system of galaxies. And guess who’ll be first on his list?"

Finally Hammond agreed.

"Tell us about your plans."

***

Again they found themselves standing on the ramp of the Gateroom, waiting for their free to go.

O’Neill’s mood went down the tubes ever since Hammond had decided to agree to Jabars plans and let them go on that dangerous mission.

It was not the physical part Jack was concerned about- he was fit again, he had slept several hours, even Fraiser had agreed, but after surviving that horror trip a day ago and then jumping right into that Goa`uld disaster again…he didn’t like the idea.

It was just peachy…

Jabar had said that they’d reach Kheb with a Pel`tak and then try to attack the Goa`uld with weapons from the ship…what a subtle plan. O’Neill knew right away that it wasn’t gonna work. Not with the Tok`Ra leading that mission.

As if it couldn’t get any worse, Jonas still wasn’t with them.

The last time O’Neill saw him he was changing clothes. The colonel started to get mad.

"Dan…", he almost chocked, calling the wrong name. "Jonas, will you get ass over here- NOW!"

It wasn’t just Carters eyes that met his. Everyone from the Gateroom personal was puzzled.

Fortunately Sam was smart enough not say a word.

Not a second passed by until Jonas finally arrived.

Now they could start their mission to Kheb.

***

"Looks pretty empty down there…"

More than one hour passed since they arrived on Kheb, searching for Jaffas while Jabar was scanning the surface.

The trees covered most of ground and even the temple seemed to be out of sight.

"Omah Desala might have killed the Goa`uld.", Teal`c guessed but Jabar who changed into a Jaffa outfit meanwhile – shook his head.

"Omah would only act if the temple was in absolute danger. The last time we’ve been able to locate Ni’irties troops they were still hundreds of miles away from the temple. I doubt that they’d come that far in such a short time."

"There!" Sam pointed excitedly at the ruins of the temple that showed up underneath them. The roof had been shattered by the weapons of death gliders and dark clouds of smoke rose from the few places, where the fire was destroying what was left from the inside.

"Oh my God.", unable to move, Jack stared through the windshield. This couldn’t have happened. Not now. Not after he’d been through this endless discussion with Jabar about the necessity of human help while there were so many other- technically more advanced- races out there that were as endangered as the humans, if not more, in case Anubis would rule.

Everything was destroyed…

"Those goddamned sons-of-a…"

"We should depart and look for survivors.", Teal`c proposed and looked straight at O’Neill.

"At first we have to make sure that the area is safe. Then we can think about departing. We don’t want to make it too easy for the Goa`uld to catch us, do we?"

Jabar hit some keys on the screen and manoeuvred the ship to an open plateau. Before even starting the camouflage technology of the Pel`tak, SG-1 already used the rings and made it’s way to the temple.

"Well, then…let’s chose the more dangerous way, I guess.", he sighed and followed the humans.

***

"Looks like a second world war scenario.", O’Neill muttered under his breath while approaching the temple.

"You know, you’re saying that too often. ", Jonas commented and followed the Colonel.

"Maybe Omah wasn’t here when they started the attack.", Sam thought aloud and checked for Jaffas.

"Maybe she just tried to tell them about snowflakes and wind of fire…", only Teal`c reacted and gave Jack an annoyed look.

"So that was the place where you’ve met Omah Desala?…in his notes, Doctor Jackson figured that the monk you’ve met had a lot alike with the Buddhist monks on earth."

Sam nodded.

"Yeah, he’s been around him all the time. He helped Daniel to learn meditating."

All SG-1 members including Jabar had reached the temple when all of a sudden a gust surrounded them while everything around still seemed to be as calm as before. They turned their heads to the direction the wind was coming from but it was gone before they could say something.

"Well that was spooky…", O’Neill said and tightened the grip on his P90.

"What was it?", Jonas asked the Colonel.

"Wind.", he answered, "Wind…happens.", before even thinking any further Jack smiled when he turned around and realized that the temple was fixed again…actually, it had never been destroyed, he figured. Instead, they just had company…

"Good trick, Omah.", he admitted.

Everyone of them still had their mouth open in excitement, when a second gust hit them and took their weapons away.

"What is this, Colonel?", Jonas asked again, still having no clue about what was going on. Jack did. He’d experienced this before.

"I think I know who that is.", Sam added and slowly approached the entrance of the temple.

"Omah?", she asked, but no one answered, not even the slightest bit of wind was perceptible.

"Omah? Are you here? We really need to talk."

The squeaking sound coming from the entrance door let them all search for their weapons instinctively. Nobody dared to speak when all of a sudden, an orange cowl appeared, fitting exactly that monk, that had caused O’Neill a lot of headaches before.

He sighed annoyed and met Carters surprised gaze.

"Once you lose the key, you’ll never be able to unlock the door to enlightenment."

His friendly smile didn’t change even though Jack obviously had some major trouble trying to understand what the heck he was talking about.

"Where’s Omah?", Sam asked very direct.

"The mother is everywhere around us. She protects us from evil.", he explained.

"Oh man…", even Carter seemed to be desperate.

"Daniel mentioned that he thinks it’s mother nature the monk is talking about.", she explained for Jabar and Jonas.

"Ok, then let’s go…", O’Neill said and walked straight to the monk. Gazing deep into his eyes he posed the most important question, that was on his mind.

"Where is Daniel?…really…I mean, is he in the temple, or is he in this wood? Where is he exactly?"

"It is not the destination on our journey that is the result of our life, it’s the path we chose to reach it."

Jack rolled his eyes and stepped back.

"Ok, next one, please."

O’Neill almost fell down the stairs, when he realized, which person this voice belonged to.

"DANIEL!"

All he wanted to do was to hug his friend, enjoy his company again, tell him, how much he’d missed him. But now, that we was standing right next to him, he hesitated. It was a weird situation. O’Neill was afraid that his friend might just disappear again when he tried to hug him, this whole illusion just a scam from the Goa`uld or pure fantasy…He wasn’t sure why he hesitated, but O’Neill just couldn’t move. All he did was staring at him incredulously.

There he stood…wearing a grey sweatshirt, beige pants, dark shoes, having the same expression he had when he was telling him about his death…

Daniel had been, still was, his very best friend. They’ve both been through some very deep shit together over the years. Of course they’ve had their arguments but eventually they’ve always been there for one another. Jack was the one sitting on Daniels death bed just a few month ago, knowing that this time, this time he’d used up all of his nine lives.

Jack only wished that Daniel hadn’t tried to act like he did, being brave facing the near and extremely painful death. From all the terrible ways of dying, Daniel had picked out the worst one.

Radiation poisoning.

Knowing, that with each second, each minute that passed by, his body was literally burning, his inner organs giving up, the blisters, that’d cover his skin…Jack didn’t want to think of it anymore.

But then again, he was the one Daniel had picked out to talk to. He was the one that was chosen to tell Jacob to stop. He’d been the one Janet Fraiser wouldn’t say a word to for weeks.

Jack felt confused…sorta.

After seeing Daniel dying, trying to get along with his death, his best friend was standing next to him again. And what was that illusion he had on Ba’als planet? Was it really Daniel, he’d talked to or was it just the results of the sarcophagus manipulating his mind?

He didn’t know. All he knew was that he was confused. He didn’t know how to react.

"Good to see you again, Daniel.", he said calmly.

Shy as always, the archaeologist, ascended super hero and Omah Desalas right hand smiled back and finally hugged Jack and the others.

Patiently he let them all check that he still looked exactly like the old Daniel Jackson, having no similarities to a ghost.

"What’re you doing here?", he asked then.

Jabar approached the archaeologist and started to explain their situation.

"We are on a mission to find Ni’Irty and her Jaffa troops, she has to be somewhere in this area. And we think she’s searching for the temple to endanger you and Omah Desalas life."

Daniels smiled and gave the monk a signal that it was ok to come closer.

"I thought you had learned by now what happens to Goa`uld that try to harm the temple or the people in it."

The Tok`Ra nodded and let Jack speak again.

"We still have to stop her. She’s trying to fight Anubis, you know, that ugly guy without a face?…Anyway, we…they found out that in case Ni’irty attacks him, he’ll let his Jaffas kill the leading Goa`uld but keep their troops and become stronger and more powerful then. And considering the size Ni’irties troops should be having by now, we are running out of time."

"So whatcha planning?", he asked, raising his eyebrows.

"Well…kill them…destroy them…let them descend to the deepest abysses of hell, however you want to call it."

"You’ll need a lot of C4 to accomplish your goal." Daniel frowned.

"Yeah…think so too. So…are you gonna help us?"

As if he hadn’t seen it coming the archaeologist looked at the colonel in disbelief.

"No."

"No?"

"No."

"What do you mean?"

"Jack, you sure know exactly what I am talking about."

"The eagle will never learn to fly, if he’s not willing to let himself fall.", the monk added and looked down smilingly at the group of people.

"Would you please quit talking like that? I’m really a fan of that stuff, but recently it’s been…pissing me off royally, if you understand what I’m talking about.", O’Neill cursed.

Even Daniel smiled now, trying to take the away the anger in this conversation.

"He’s right, Jack.", he explained.

"What?"

"I cannot help you. It’s against Omah’s law. I’m sorry."

An even angrier Jack O’Neill now stepped right in front of Daniel, poking his finger against the archaeologists chest.

"So you’re trying to tell me that you’ll hide in this temple while the Goa`uld might kill us while we’re trying to save the world?…Your world?"

"I’m not forcing you to leave. You are very welcome to stay, if you want."

"I can’t believe this…"

Furious he looked away, watching the water in the spring fountain close by. Daniel gave his friend some time to calm down while he followed the monk back into Omah’s temple. Sam, Teal`c, Jonas and Jabar accompanied him.

Like the last time, they were welcomed by the semi- dark light of the entrance hall. Only a few candles illuminated the huge room and made it hardly possible to see the whole temple.

Daniels stopped at the star shaped place where Sam had seen him meditating the last time.

She was still to much in shock to realize that it was Daniel, who stood in front of her, lovely giving her a kiss on the cheek, calling her a dear friend, he really missed.

Sam had never even imagined to see him again, specially not alive. After everything they’ve been through while he was slowly dying she figured that the bright light, that was taking Daniel away, was some sort of angel that’d take care of his soul from now on.

Apparently it was much more than that.

"You’ve been here all the time?", she asked touching his arm.

"No.", Daniel responded and lightened a candle with the use of his mind, "Omah lead me to many places and showed me everything I wanted to see."

"So how are you feeling, Doctor Jackson?", Jonas asked curiously.

"Well, I do have the power to do more, this way…but not by using violence, it’s just like…like a new life, which doesn’t mean that I don’t miss my old life. Once in a while it’s pretty lonely here, only me and Obi and those endless discussions…I mean, it’s really interesting, I just miss you all."

"Obi?", Sam raised and eyebrow and looked at Teal`c. The Jaffa seemed to be as unsuspecting as she was.

"Yeah,", Daniel smiled, "The monk. He didn’t have a name so I called him Obi. Names don’t mean that much on Kheb."

When no one answered, a depressing silence filled out the dark room. Daniel was the first one who dared saying something again.

"It’s not really what you’ve expected, isn’t it?...I haven’t become some sort of super hero, that’ll play your guardian angel every time you need me…"

"That’s not true.", Sam defended herself.

"Are you sure?", obviously disappointed the archaeologist turned his head in her direction and let out a nearly inaudible sigh, "I cannot kill any Jaffa, that’s against everything I believe in. And as hard as it is for me, I cannot consider you more worthwhile than any other living being. I chose this way because I wanted to reach more and now that I’ve chosen this path I got to follow it, even though it might mean that our friendship will end here."

Slowly he approached the star shaped area of meditating and sat down, when Sam tried to convince him again.

"That’s not true, Daniel. Nobody expects you to help or guard us. We came here to protect the temple from Ni’irties troops and sabotage her plans to kill Anubis. Maybe the colonel did overreact a little bit, but that doesn’t mean, that he’s mad at you. Deep inside he knows that you don’t have a choice."

He nodded but didn’t say anything more. Instead, it appeared that he wanted them to leave now and let him meditate. Sam didn’t want to interfere with Daniels daily routine much longer and headed for the exit. The others followed her quietly.

***

It was the third time Jack kicked against the small wall of pictograms that surrounded the spring fountain.

Who the hell did this Casper- junior think he is?

Four month ago he’d have loved to kill every Goa`uld that crossed their way with his bare hands and now, all of a sudden he refused to help them killing Ni’irty.

That was just…peachy.

Was this the same Daniel Jackson he said he admired, sitting on his death bed?…Hard to believe.

Again he kicked at the wall, seeing with satisfaction that some of the stones broke loose already. Before he could kick one more time, Jack felt that he was being observed.

Turning around he sighed realizing who it was.

"Oh, the almighty…do you prefer me calling you God or is it enough when I just kneel down?"

Daniel took a deep breath, although that wasn’t necessary, seeing that he wasn’t a human anymore. It took a long time, until he responded.

"You’re gonna do what you want anyway. So why don’t you just leave? Start your war out there and forget about me."

"It would have been our war a few month ago…", Jack hissed.

Daniel ignored him and walked around the spring fountain, pointed at the exit.

"Here, it’s time to go. You’ll find your weapons out there."

O’Neill looked at him confused and shook his head.

"It’d be a lot easier if you’d help us- if we don’t stop them, Anubis will with the help of their troops become the mightiest Goa`uld you can imagine. And once he’s strong enough – which won’t take much more time as soon as he rules about all the snakeheads- he’ll conquer the Asgard and all our allies and destroy earth. Is that, what you want?"

"It’s not me to judge his actions.", the archaeologist responded shortly.

"Then why don’t you just ask Omah?"

"Because she’d disagree one way or the other. Do what you gotta do, blow this whole planet into pieces if you want…"

"It is very obvious to me, that you’ve lost much of your character and common sense together with your human body, Daniel…".

This sentence was meant to hurt and neither Sam nor Teal`c, who had just left the temple dared to say anything.

Daniel didn’t even look at the colonel anymore.

"Is it that endless discussion again? How different we are, you’re so brilliant and I’m so naïve?…I thought we had clarified that after Reese’s death."

Slowly O’Neill get red in the face. THAT was a bad sign.

"All we clarified was that there are moments, when you’re completely losing your common sense- I think now it’s the time again.

"Colonel…", Sam tried to interact but she was being ignored.

"Actually we clarified that there are moments in your life in which you should rather put your common sense above your ignorance…I guess you’ll never figure it out."

Furious O’Neill got up and pointed at the exit.

"Carter, get Jabar and Jonas here, and please, leave that goddamned monk wherever he is, NOW"

"Colonel."

"Carter? Did I express my orders unintelligible in some way?"

"No, Sir…"

Sam was shocked about the end of this argument. O’Neill had been out of line…way, way out of line and Daniel was hurt, she knew that. But Carter had orders to obey and Teal`c certainly wasn’t the right person to smooth their anger at each other.

She wanted to check on Daniel but the archaeologist was gone…as the wind.

Maybe she was lucky enough to see him again before they left for earth, they’ve had a lot to talk about…

***

On their following walk through the forest, in which they expected Ni’irty, nobody dared to speak. O’Neill took the alpha position stubbornly because this way he didn’t have to see their faces after putting down Daniel so much. Jabar didn’t care about their inter- human- relationships and Sam and Teal`c were on the same side, a discussion was senseless.

And Jonas…well…he was neutral.

But Sam wanted to talk to the colonel badly. He hadn’t been fair to the archaeologist. It wasn’t Daniels decision not to help him, it was a rule he was forced to obey. And even less fair had been the way he treated his former friend. Daniel had used the only chance there was to survive his radiation poisoning, even tough that meant the loss of his body and his inability to talk to his friends. But he was alive. Alive and well, he wasn’t gone for good.

There’d had been some moments in which Sam had been mad, that Daniel told Jacob to stop, that he refused to try and fight for his recuperation but eventually…he had been right. There had been no chance of survival.

Daniel had decided to live a less violent life under Omah’s control and at the end…it was his life.

Just the thought that Jack had treated him like dog dirt for the only possibility to survive, caused stitches in Sams heart.

Maybe the Colonel didn’t think when they had their…argument, but what would have happened if Daniel had been dead?

There’d been no further discussions whatsoever.

This was his way…without inner bleedings, contaminated to the last cell of his body.

Sam started to get really mad at O’Neill. When she couldn’t resist any longer, she passed by Teal`c and approached Jack.

"Colonel?", the Major asked, only a few feet away from him.

"I don’t wanne hear it, Carter."

Sam came closer. She was stubborn, too.

"You did him wrong, Colonel and you should know that."

With eyes full of anger he stopped turned his head towards his major.

"If something happens to us later on, just because he didn’t want to help us, I’ll blow that goddamned temple into pieces myself!"

"Sir, you don’t have the right to treat him like that. It’s his way and he cannot break all the rules he has to obey just because you want it."

"You tell me that again when we’re under heavy fire as soon as we reach Ni’irties camp."

"Than it’s our fault, not his."

Shocked about the surprising answer he stood there for a moment, thinking, and turned his back towards her again, continuing his march. Sam saw her chance.

"Would you have preferred, seeing him dying that day?"

All of a sudden he stopped, still having his back turned to the others.

"Sir, I know for sure that Daniel would help us in a heartbeat, but he can’t. He offered us to stay in the temple to be safe but we wouldn’t listen. Instead we were the ones deciding that we have to find Ni’irty. If something happened to us, it’d be our fault, not your best friends."

***

"You’ve promised me to eliminate your burdens."

Omah’s voice sounded stricter than ever before. Nodding, Daniel continued to walk around the spring fountain.

"I feel that I should still try to help Jack. I could never forgive myself if something happened to him or the others."

Slowly they entered the temple.

"To let your past influence your future actions again?"

"What am I supposed to do?…You cannot tell me that I should watch innocent human beings being butchered by the Goa`uld."

Omah nodded.

"It is their way. Come, Daniel…let me tell you a story."

She sat down in the middle of the star shaped place for meditation and waited for the archaeologist to follow her. Afterwards she used a small stick of wood and pointed it at Daniel.

"What do you see?"

He got confused- as often, ever since he started living with Omah.

"A stick…a short stick, probably made of wood a few hundred years ago. Should run a test to determine the age-"

"If you say, that it is a short stick, then you are ignoring it’s true existance. But if you don’t say that, you are ignoring that fact."

"A…and that means?"

Omah smiled patiently.

"Look through the façade, Daniel. Think, before you do something and don’t let your present feelings and emotions fog up your mind."

Compromisingly he nodded.

"May I tell you something too?"

"Of course."

"Ok…ehm…I read this in Buddhist writings a few years ago, took me a while to understand it. It was about the monk Manjusri. One day he stood in front of the doors of Buddha’s temple. Buddha called him and asked why he didn’t come in when Manjusri answered that he didn’t see himself outside, why entering?"

Omah seemed to be confused but nodded smilingly.

"This is a wonderful story, Daniel."

The archaeologist was disappointed that she didn’t understood what he tried to say.

"Actually I hoped you’d figure out yourself, what I was trying to tell you."

"That you still feel too much bound up with your friends, that you’d put your desire to be with them over all the rules that I’ve asked you to obey."

Hesitating, Daniel smiled.

"Actually…you are right. But not because I don’t respect your rules, it’s just…I want to help them."

"But you know, that I have asked you to obey these rules for a specific reason. I’ve asked you to eliminate your burdens, but you still cannot forget about your past."

"Because I thought that this way I could do more…more good things. And the only good thing that comes to my mind right now is, to destroy Ni’irties troops to prevent Anubis from getting even more powerful than he is right now. If we allow him to become the most powerful being in this universe, he’ll not just destroy the earth but also our planet, our race, our culture. If I had the choice between his death and the death of billions of innocent people, then I knew I’d rather kill him myself then endangering innocent people."

Omah inhaled deeply and closed her eyes for a second.

"If I wasn’t convinced by your braveness, I wouldn’t let you go- but don’t forget one thing: you are only there to protect your friends, not to kill others."

***

"Carter, shield us from the right side, Teal`c left. Jonas, Jabar, you stay in the middle, is that clear?"

The tension in Jacks voice got worse each minute, after finding out that they were getting pursued- by dozens of Jaffa. Fortunately they had taken the wrong route and came out at their starting point again, finding lots of foot prints of Goa`uld warriors. Ever since then they’ve been very careful in their behaviour, being ready to flee and hide in less than a fraction of a second.

"What are we gonna do when they encircle us? We’d have a much higher chance of survival if we’d go straight back to the ship."

Jabars voice wasn’t just loud, it was also slowly starting to really piss O’Neill off.

It had been his stupid plan to find Ni’irty and now he wanted play coward? For crying out loud, what the hell did those Tok`Ra think they are?

"We could go back and trade you in for the sake of our freedom, if you want."

Offended the Tok`Ra didn’t even respond, feeling good enough knowing that he was protected from each side.

"There might be too many Jaffa for us to conquer, O’Neill.", Teal`c guessed und looked around.

"I know, that’s why I was trying to find a place to hide and find it out. If they’re too many, we return and this mission’s just…wrecked."

"Sir, Ni’irty might make us to hosts for her Goa`uld in case she finds us.", Sam pointed out nervously, never ceasing to check on her environment.

"At the moment I’m not in the mood for your pessimism, Carter…Jonas, you look for possible places to hide."

The man from Kelowna nodded understandingly and gazed around but in this forest nothing seemed to be suitable enough as a good hiding place, except some thick old trees but that wasn’t really an option.

All of a sudden a gust come up again, letting the leaves on the ground fly around SG-1. O’Neill had his P90 ready to fire when he realized, that it was just the wind and no Goa`uld ambush.

"Let’s get outta here soon, this is starting to get spooky.", he admitted and suddenly saw a small path the leaves had formed in front of him.

His eyes followed the trace and saw that they lead to a huge bush not far away from their position.

"I can’t believe that…", he said astonished and realized that Sam and Teal`c had come closer to him to also see what happened.

"Sir, maybe it’s Daniel."

Jack was confused, but nodded finally.

"Yeah…maybe. Let’s follow it."

SG-1 got moving again and soon reached the head high bush that enclosed a couple of trees. This could be a perfect place to hide, O’Neill thought. Maybe Carter was right and Daniel really tried to help them. It was about time…

"We could hide in here.", Jonas supported Jacks thoughts and approached the bushes, followed by Carter and Teal`c.

Unfortunately they didn’t expect the surprised that stood in front of them a second later…

To be continued…

Authors notes: For a German girl, it’s a challenge to write an English Stargate- FF- please consider that!

Feedback is appreciated.

© July 2004 The characters mentioned in this story are the property of Showtime and Gekko Film Corp. The Stargate, SG-I, the Goa’uld and all other characters who have appeared in the series STARGATE SG-1 together with the names, titles and back story are the sole copyright property of MGM-UA Worldwide Television, Gekko Film Corp, Glassner/Wright Double Secret Productions and Stargate SG-I Prod. Ltd. Partnership. This fanfic is not intended as an infringement upon those rights and solely meant for entertainment. All other characters, the story idea and the story itself are the sole property of the author. This story was reprinted with the permission of the author.