Colonel Jack O'Neill sighed heavily, "I really hate this part." He looked down at the bed he had been guarding over for the last twenty-four hours. "And why is it always Daniel?" He reached down and gentile moved a stray lock of hair from the archaeologist’s forehead. "Well at least his fever is a little lower."
It had started off as a routine mission, but than again, most of them did. However two days into it, Daniel had become sluggish, and started coughing. By that evening he was running high fever, and was having a hard time breathing. Teal'c had ended up having to carry the fallen team member the remainder of the way back to the gate. Dr. Fraiser had admitted Daniel into the infirmary with phenomena. Jack had the distinct feeling of daja vu.
Jack's thoughts were interrupted when Daniel stirred slightly. Underneath closed lids the civilian's eyes began to moved back and forth, a tell tail sing that another dream was upon him. "I hope it’s a good dream this time Danny" The linguist's brow began to crease and his jaw muscles tightened. "Guess not" Daniel started to struggle violently as the dreams intensity increased.
"NO Adam stop" The archaeologist’s voice was pleading as he began to cry out against unseen dangers.
"Danny, its ok, shhhhh." Jack held the younger man's shoulders, softly shaking him, trying to bring him back to reality and away from the fear in his mind. "Come on kiddo."
"Please, don't, stop, please Adam"
"Danny come on, wake up kiddo. Your safe. No one is going to hurt you." Jack hoped desperately that his voice would break through the fevered haze in Daniels thoughts and comfort him.
The nightmare lasted only a few minutes, although to Jack it seamed like hours. Than as abruptly as it had started the dream ended and Daniel stilled once again. Jack sighed and sat back waiting for the next time his friend was tormented by the nightmares.
O'Neill had not even realized how tired he was, but some time in the early hours of the morning he began to dose fitfully. He woke not more than a couple of hours later when Daniel began coughing. It took the colonel a minute to remember where he was. Sitting forward in the hard plastic chair, O'Neill reached out and touched Daniel's forehead. Although the shin of still sweat remained, the young man's fever had broken and his sleep seemed more peaceful. Relief flooded over the Colonel. "Thank God." Settling back in his chair Jack waited for morning to come.
It was just before 06:00 when Jackson began to stir. Afraid that it might be another nightmare causing Daniel's movements, Jack took his friends hand and began talking to him, reassuring him, as he had done many times through out the last twenty four hours.
"Jack?" Daniels voice was little more than a croak
The colonel smiled, and gently stroked Jackson's cheek. "Hay Space Monkey, how ya feeling".
"Like hell, what happened"
"You got phenomena while we were on PX 25J"
"Ahh yah, I remember, sort of." He took a deep breath. "Did we at least get the samples?"
"Yep, Carter got them while you were unconscious." Jack squeezed Daniel's hand. "Don't worried about it kiddo, just go back to sleep and get better ok. I still need you to come and watch the Stanley Cup with me next weekend."
Daniel smiled. "Wouldn't miss it. Jack." He closed his eyes. "Jack, what sport is the Stanley Cup again?"
"Augg, it's hockey Daniel, hockey."
"Oh right." The Archaeologist began to breath a little deeper and his body melted into that mattress again, and Jack knew that his friend had retreated back into sleep.
* * *
Two days later Daniel was sitting up in bed reading a book when his friend entered the infirmary.
"Hay Jack, whets up."
The Colonel pulled up his chair. "Not much, how you feeling?"
"Better. Janet thinks I can probably get out of her tomorrow and finish recuperating at home."
"Good." Jack paused for a minute before continuing. "Hay Dan, who is Adam?"
Daniel tensed visibly at the mention of the name. "Foster Father, why Jack." Even Daniels voice seemed tight.
"When you were sick, you had nightmares. You called out his name. You seemed pretty afraid of him."
"It was a fever induced dream Jack, that’s all." Daniels voice took on an "end of conversation tone".
"I asked Janet and she said that usually dreams like that had a strong base in reality."
"Leave it alone Jack" Daniel picked up his book again, hoping to end the conversation, he really didn't want to tell Jack about Adam.
" All right Daniel, I can't make you tell me, why your so afraid of this guy. But I will tell you this." O'Neill's voice was tired, but soft and kind. "Like it or not, you, me, Carter and Teal'c have become a family. We fight side by side and laugh side by side. We care about each other and worry about each other. And we may really be all that any of us has. But you keep forcing us away Daniel and that is killing us. It kills us when you wont let us help you like you have us, so many times." Jack didn't wait for a reply, he simply stood and left the room.
Daniel watched as is friend left. He could feel a lump in his thought. "Jack you really don't want to know, trust me." Daniel tried to go back to the book in his hands but was unable to concentrate Jacks words echoed in his ears. "It's killing us"
By that evening Daniel felt guilty, tired, sad and drained. He had done nothing all day but replay Jacks words over and over again. Even though his chest was still congested and all he wanted was sleep, rest wouldn't come. He knew what he had to do, but the thought of telling Jack about Adam made him sick. What would the hardened Colonel say. But there would be no solas until he confided in his friend. Finally at about 18:00 he asked Janet if she could get the Colonel for him.
O'Neill for his part had spent the remainder of the day sitting around his office accomplishing nothing but worrying. Did he make things worse or would Daniel final unburden himself of the unknown pain of his past. When Janet phoned Jack's office and told him Daniel was asking for him, he all but sprinted to the infirmary.
"Hay, what's up?" He took his customary seat next to Jackson's bed.
Daniel sighed. "You sure you really want to know about Adam?"
"Hit with your best shot Space Monkey" Jack waited, breath held for the younger man to begin.
Daniel couldn't make eye contact with Jack as he started the story. He had never actually told anyone this. "After my parents died I got sent to live with Adam and Julie. Even in those first few days they were uncaring and harsh, at least when the social workers weren't around that is. They didn't care that I cried myself to sleep at night, and had nightmares. Neither of them ever tried to comfort me. In fact one night I woke up screaming for my Mother. Adam barged into my room and began telling me to shut up, that my snivelling was keeping him awake." Daniel swallowed hard. " After the social workers stopped coming around, satisfied that I was adjusting, things got worse. I tripped over the cat one day and fell. I knocked a table and a vase fell and shattered. Adam came into the room. He didn’t say anything, he just back handed me with his fist. I had my first shiner. After that it became almost like clock work. When he was happy, angry, it didn't matter, he started beating me. Usually he left my face alone. He went for places that no one could see. Most of the time I had a hard time walking. There were times I couldn't lie down at night."
Jack watched and listened intently as Daniel talked. The Archaeologist had pulled his knees up to his chest and had his arms wrapped around them. He was rocking back and forth slightly. Daniel began again, Jack could tell by his voice he was fighting to hold back the tears. "Some how just hitting and kicking me wasn't enough. He discovered that his leather belt left wonderfully bloody welts on bare skin. He began to say things while he beat me. Things about my parents. They wer, they were pancakes. He thought it was funny to make squish sounds. He would force me to answer questions about how much blood there had been, and what crushed skulls looked like" Tears were rolling down the young man's face now. "Than one night after whipping me he dragged me to the basement. There was a cold room built into the floor. It was really just a pit. No lights. Dirt floor. Rats and spiders. He forced me into the hole and closed the door. He put something heavy on it so that I couldn't move it. I was so afraid. I begged him to let me out, but he just laughed. I would rather he beat me a thousand times that lock me down there. I huddled on the top step my face to a crack in the door, trying to stay in what little light it provided. I cried until I was dehydrated and hoarse. That was always the worst part of Adam's punishments, was beings locked down there. Sometimes it was only for a few hours, and others it was for days." Daniel forced himself to look at jack.
"I'm so sorry Daniel." Jack moved to sit on the side of the bed. He took Daniel into his arms and held him tight, wishing he could take all that pain away. Daniel gladly accepted the embrace and buried his face in Jacks sholder. Jack could feel Daniels tears as they slowly soaked his shirt. "Did you ever tell anyone".
Daniel shook his head aginst Jacks sholder. "I was afraid, he kept telling me that there were far worse foster familys out there, I didn't know any better.
"What about Julie" Jack gently rubbed Daniels back.
"She was an alcoholic, she didn't care as long as she had a bottle in her hands. In fact I'm pretty sure she was glad, cause it took the heat off her."
Jack could think of nothing else to say. So instead he just held his friend, rubbing his back. They sat there for almost an hour and O'Neill was pretty sure Daniel would have stayed in his arms all night. But Jack felt Daniel coughed slightly, and it forcing the reality that he was still quite ill, and that this had not exactly been a restful day.
"Come on Danny, you need to get some sleep." Jack leaned forward gently depositing Daniel onto the pillow.
Daniel nodded. His eyes were dull and blood shot. "Jack?"
"Hmmm"
"Will you stay with me till I fall asleep?" Daniel's voice was soft and venerable.
"No intentions of leaving at all." Jack took Daniels hand, and began to caress the younger man's forehead. It wasn't long before exhaustion forced Daniel's eyes closed.
As the civilians breathing slowed and sleep took hold, Jack bent forward and kissed Daniel's brow. " Don't worry Space Monkey, I'm not going to let anyone hurt you ever again."
A slight smile crossed the ill man's lips, "I know you wont Jack."
© December, 2003 The characters mentioned in this story are the property of Showtime and Gekko Film Corp. The Stargate, SG-I, the Goa'uld and all other characters who have appeared in the series STARGATE SG-1 together with the names, titles and backstory are the sole copyright property of MGM-UA Worldwide Television, Gekko Film Corp, Glassner/Wright Double Secret Productions and Stargate SG-I Prod. Ltd. Partnership. This fanfic is not intended as an infringement upon those rights and solely meant for entertainment. All other characters, the story idea and the story itself are the sole property of the author.