"Okay, Daniel, listen up," Jack O'Neill spoke, following his friend through the doorway into the other's office space. Hefting his backpack up onto the worktable, he caught his breath and finished, "Next time you throw rocks in my backpack, you're carrying it yourself. Got that?"
Unzipping his own pack, Jackson carefully removed a flat stone. "It's an artifact, Jack. How many times--?"
"Nada!" He pointed to the smooth slab his friend was holding. "That stone with squiggly writing you claim to read is an artifact. I'll admit that one. But," he unzipped his own pack and reaching inside, withdrew a large, craggy nugget. "This is just a plain damn rock."
They both stared at the alien rock, now glowing from within. "What the hell?" O'Neill said. "It wasn't blue when we put it there."
"Uh, Jack," Daniel began. "Maybe you should--"
Before the statement was finished, the rock in question exploded in the colonel's hand, throwing stone shards at the surprised man. "Daniel, get back," he ordered, sucking in his breath as his right hand and wrist began to burn from the effects of the explosion. Shaking his hand he looked down to find it was coated with a blue, phosphorous-looking material, then realized that spots on his neck and chin also felt on fire.
Both men reached for the backpack simultaneously to check the remaining rocks when another explosion erupted from the bag, blowing straight up and knocking out the fluorescent lighting, plunging them into darkness. O'Neill attempted to zip the bag, the fingers of his right hand proving to be uncooperative. "Daniel! Get out of here before the whole thing blows," he shouted once more, gauging his own distance from the open doorway.
"I'm not leaving you--"
"Go, Daniel. Consider it an order. I'm right behind--"
The worktable stood between the colonel and the door and before he could navigate around it, the closed backpack split apart at its seams, shards of exploding stone knocking him backward into the metal bookcase.
"Jack?" Receiving no reply, Daniel ran into the hall and grabbed the nearest telephone, sounded the alarm to request medical back up, then returned to the chaos that used to be his office. Moving to the opposite side of the room he clicked on the desk lamp before searching for his friend.
Colonel O'Neill was unmoving, half-propped against the bookcase when Jackson reached him. "Jack?" he called once more, kneeling in front of his friend, disregarding the broken glass and rocks around him. Placing both hands on his friend's face, he hoped to find him conscious. "C'mon, Jack. Can you hear me?"
Spots of blue slime were splattered at random on the colonel's face, neck and hands, other splotches apparently eating through his flak jacket. In addition to the blue "burns", a goose egg had already formed on his right temple, azure goo damming up the thin trails of red streaming down his face, causing the blood to change its course.
Out of the corner of his eye, Daniel saw two large-sized rocks beginning to glow, and making a split-second decision, he tugged the colonel around and grabbed him beneath his arms, dragging him across the floor. With a grunt and final heave, Jackson reached the open doorway just as the rocks exploded, the debris hitting the bookcase where O'Neill had been lying. Carefully, he lowered his burden onto the floor, thankful to hear signs indicating backup was on the way. "Over here," he shouted as an orderly and Dr. Fraiser rounded the corner.
Quickly taking in the scene, the doctor ran the rest of the length of hallway. "What happened?"
"Rocks." Daniel shook his head in bewilderment. "An unknown substance, Janet.the rocks exploded. I don't know if it's a contaminant," he explained while moving out of her way.
"We'll treat it as such until we know otherwise," she tersely replied. "Let's get him to the infirmary."
*****
Colonel O'Neill grunted softly, screwing up his face in pain as awareness slowly returned.
"Jack? How're you doing?"
The colonel sighed without opening his eyes. "Daniel?" He paused and Daniel could read the question on his face even before he spoke. "Was I just taken out by blue rocks?"
"Well, um.technically yes. Exploding, blue rocks. Quite volatile ones actually."
O'Neill opened his eyes and peered at his surroundings. "Oh yeah, let's not forget volatile." He reached up his hand to touch his forehead only to find both hands sheathed in white gauze. "Ouch."
Before he could voice his next question, Daniel explained, "You received burns from the explosion. Your hands are the worst with second-degree burns. There's another bad one on your neck, but the ones on your face are first degree."
"And that's the good news? Then why does my head feel like it's gonna fall off?" he asked, reaching up his fingers to touch the strip of gauze above his eye.
"Your backpack exploded and you were knocked out," Jackson admitted. "Janet had to stitch you up."
"Not the easiest way to get stoned," O'Neill muttered.
"Huh?"
"Nothing, Daniel." The colonel finally took in his surroundings and realized he was in his own quarters. "Why am I here and not the infirmary? Not that I'm complaining."
"Well, uh, that's another story. I had Teal'c move you here. About a third of the base got sick after eating in the chow hall tonight. It was something called 'tuna-noodle surprise'," Daniel replied.
"Bet I can guess what the surprise was."
"Janet, Sam and the general all were hit. I didn't think you would want to wake up there."
"Good call. They actually ate that stuff?" O'Neill mumbled, making a face while swinging his legs over the bed. Groaning, he sat up, dropping his aching head into his cushioned hands.
Daniel placed a hand on his shoulder. "Steady. Don't you think you should lay back down?"
"No. What a report this is going to make. 'Air Force Colonel taken out by alien rocks. Details at eleven.'"
"Yeah, well, uh--" Jackson hesitated. "I'm sorry, Jack."
"You're sorry 'cause the rocks got me and not you?"
"No. Well, yes. I mean, I was the one who brought the rocks home."
O'Neill raised his head to stare blearily at his friend. "Daniel," he began, then shook his head in frustration. "Do you really think this is your fault?"
"Well.yes."
"Question? How long have you known me?"
"About three years, I guess."
"And in those three years, how many times have you seen me do something I really didn't want to do?"
"Including the general's orders ?" Jackson shot back.
"Not including orders -- we won't go there. How many times?"
"Um.not many. Maybe none."
"You're right. None. And if I had not wanted to carry back your pile of rocks, it would still be on PR8-419 just waiting to explode."
"Well, technically they didn't ignite until reaching our atmosphere," Jackson corrected. "Sam was checking the composition of the core of the rocks when she got sick, but apparently--"
"Hold it!" O'Neill shouted, then groaned when the sound reverberated in his head. Quietly he added, "Right now, I don't care how it happened. But it wasn't your fault, Daniel. You got that?"
Jackson finally nodded. "I guess so."
"I know so," the colonel reaffirmed, then stood up. "How about we get out of here and get some fresh air?"
"I don't think Janet--"
"--Janet is probably still surprising herself with dinner. Let's blow this joint while we have the chance. How about some pizza?"
"Sounds better than tuna."
"When you're right, you're right, doctor. And the beer's already chillin' in my fridge." O'Neill looked in the mirror at the red blotches on his face and the strips of gauze on his forehead and neck. "I look like a damn clown -- and don't you dare apologize again, Jackson," he added, looking at Daniel's stricken face in the mirror. "But looks like you have to drive this time." He held up his bandaged hands, then turned, reaching for his leather jacket. "Home, James."
"Don't push it, Jack."
© February 14, 2000 The characters mentioned in this story are the property of Showtime and Gekko Film Corp. The Stargate, SG-I, the Goa’uld and all other characters who have appeared in the series STARGATE SG-1 together with the names, titles and backstory are the sole copyright property of MGM-UA Worldwide Television, Gekko Film Corp, Glassner/Wright Double Secret Productions and Stargate SG-I Prod. Ltd. Partnership. This fanfic is not intended as an infringement upon those rights and solely meant for entertainment. All other characters, the story idea and the story itself are the sole property of the author.